Megan Monique
Pregnancy Crack 01/28/2012
 
When I first found out I was pregnant, I thought it was gonna be a breeze. I thought I would handle it like a champ. I truly had no idea what I was/am in store for now and in the future.

The truth is that the last 7 weeks of my life have been difficult. Literally sickening and sprinkled with moments of depression and sadness. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm excited about the bundle of joy I'm brewing up inside of me. I believe this special little one has a very important role to play in the world. 

But there are also so some serious emotions that come along with this process. I found it hard to write, difficult to be around people and experienced a serious lack of inspiration.

Basically, the version of myself that I had come to know and love over the past 25 years had vanished. Sure there are traces of her here and there, but in the grand scheme of things, she was gone. 

I'm still mourning loss of her. But now more than ever, enthusiasm sweeps over me when I feel my tummy begin to grow. 

For now, I'm picking of the pieces of me and rearranging them in a new way, that allows me to fully embrace my new life in the best way possible. 

I'm not one of those women who seem like their on pregnancy crack - like this is the moment they were born for and nothing else matters. I'm not someone who has an easy pregnancy with no speed bumps. 

I am a mom who does the best she can every day with what she has. I've now made peace with the fact, that that is just how it's going to be. Tomorrow morning, I'll be making peace again. 

Megan Monique 
 


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